From a Loving But Not So Perfect Father

I am just like any other dad, loving, but not so perfect. I will be honest to admit that I have struggled to juggle between being a breadwinner and an involved dad. But the journey has been wonderful so far.

A Father was Born

A child and parents together grow from being clueless, listening to endless advice, to managing it one day at a time until starting to enjoy each day. And finally, looking back to wonder how far they have come. This is the story of me being born as a father, growing and wondering what a journey it has been.

Ask me what I enjoy most about being a dad. It is the company of this young man. Yes, my little boy, Aditya, is a grown-up man, 16 now. Both of us are Tom Cruise fans. In fact, we had a blast watching Top Gun last week. However, when he was growing up, it was different. We bonded more over the football coaching that he went for. So, this was our dad-son weekend outing ritual, a good 3-4 hours where I watched him play. He would discuss the match with great enthusiasm on our drive home, loved those days.

I have always laid emphasis on academics, both for myself and him. My approach to science and math has always been driven by fundamentals and is inquiry-based. I found Aditya too had similar interests. When he started going to school, we gradually saw the gaps in his understanding of concepts and his general approach to problem-solving. The traditional rote learning method was not enough for his in-depth knowledge of a subject. Also, it was non-immersive and, as a result, he would very often lose interest and focus.

A Child’s Challenge is a Parent’s Business Idea

Our business today has its roots in our journey of parenthood.

The disconnect between theory and application became more clear as Aditya progressed to higher grades.

This was what made us think more about this problem, as parents, and it sowed the seed for our venture into Experiential Learning. Eventually, we started up an Education company for STEM-based learning. And finally, ‘Make & Learn’ was born.

Since I already had a running manufacturing business, starting a second new venture was not that difficult.

Make and Learn, was born in Bangalore, Karnataka, and has been in active operation for over six years. We manufacture and supply Do-It-Yourself, STEM-based educational activities, and models. We designed the models and activities keeping in mind of child’s age, appropriateness of skills for that age, and safety.

We believe that after performing the activities and making the models of “Make and Learn”, a child will understand a concept in a very playful and fun manner. Further, they can remember the concept and apply the same in their everyday life. The feedback that we receive from parents reinforces our beliefs repeatedly. The impact on the learning abilities and retention capabilities of children pushes us to improve each day.

More Learnings

I believe parenting and, more precisely, fatherhood these days differs from what it was when we were young. Our fathers, however loving, were strict disciplinarians. They were the providers, philosophers, and guides, but less of a friend. Today, the dynamics are different. The role of fathers has seen a shift. We are more involved, we play together, learn from each other, and have a much deeper connection. I am happy I have been able to crack that code fairly well.

I am amazed at the poise with which Aditya plays the referee when my wife and I run into a disagreement. He is unbiased and so mature with how he handles the situation. We later have a laugh at how easily he plays the wiser one among the three of us. His calm and patient attitude is something I look up to. I secretly learn from him. I guess the saying, ‘Child is the Father of a man’ is indeed true. He sometimes feels like ‘Fatherhood 2.0’.

I would also connect his behavior to us treating him as an independent human being. We have always respected his individuality and opinions. That is also our go-to mantra for parenting.

Also Read ‘Like Father. Like Child: A Unique Relationship’

We have come quite far in this Journey

As I write this piece, it is interesting to look back on how far we have come in our journey as a father-son duo. It feels like it was only yesterday when I would return home after having a long day at my newly established manufacturing start-up (which was just like another baby to me). This cute little face welcomed me home with curly locks hanging over it and a smile that could brighten up the gloomiest day ever. Fast forward to today, where our dining table conversations range from career choices and the latest movies to trying to get a sneak peek into his love life.

By the way, he is very guarded and gives us no clues. I am waiting for the day when he opens up about his love interests and I can share my tips with him. My top tip would be how he must respect his partner and acknowledge unique personalities and opinions. But do I need to tell him that? I am sure he understands the unspoken mutual bond of respect, appreciation, and love we three share for each other.

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